Friday, August 12, 2011
This fits fairly well.
OBVIOUSLY WE ARE THE SECRET POLICE.
Somehow I don't feel better--that was supposed to amuse me...
I have some things to talk about. What I alluded to before, about the Commune's old members...
They're all dead.
Feels abrupt and weird saying this in a blog post. Like I shouldn't talk about it. I know I don't really want to. I don't like thinking about it.
If Doc and I had been brought in even a bit earlier, we would have been killed.
Remember how HiveTree "noms" souls? It was an experiment done by the Commune. There was a vote between WhiteSuit, HiveTree, and MistHeart--the top three of the Commune. WhiteSuit voted against, HiveTree for... And so Mistheart voted for, to side with HiveTree.
When I last talked to her, she said she had regretted it.
The experiment allowed HiveTree to kill the Commune members and use their souls to create a... Death Veil. It surrounds him and he can control it.
Heartless bastard, indeed.
It was also right before I had been brought to the Commune. MistHeart said that if Doc and I had been brought in earlier, we probably would have been killed... Dear Timelord, I am so glad we escaped that fate. WhiteSuit, as said, hates talking about it. Understandable...
Though, despite that news, everything else here has been slow... Which is agonizing.
When nothing happens, I get bored. When I'm bored, I think. When I think for long periods of time, I worry. When I worry, I get stressed and think some more. Soon, I panic and question everything.
Recently, with how close I've been with WhiteSuit, and Session coming...
I suppose the best way to put it is that I have two people in my head arguing over whether this is right, and to really do this. Which is silly, I don't quite have a choice at this point... Two days.
Part of the debate I'm having is also generally about WhiteSuit. I've pushed it to the back of my mind, but he threatened to kill me two Sessions ago. That's not that long ago. What? Everything's dandy and fine, now? I can't just ignore that. If everyone's like that around Session, should I be hiding away?
Not really wanting to. Probably the biggest event in my life, right? Not like I do much with my life, so as sad as it is, it's true...
It feels horrible. Impending doom. And Impending doom feels lonely.
I'm just so worried.